Community, calling, and other mommy emotions

This blog is going to be a bit of a ramble, but I have started a few times on each topic, but they all oddly enough kind of go together, so bare with me. 

Did you ever dream of your life as a mother the way you might have dreamed of your wedding day? I kind of did. While I enjoyed (for the most part) my time working a real career, I always day dreamed of the day that I would be a stay-at-home mom. What my afternoons would look like; what I would be able to do with my children instead of staring at my computer screen each day; and how much I would enjoy being with them. These things would cross my mind regularly and now that all is true, my reality is even better.

When I had Calan, life was good, but early on, as in 2 months after he was born, I was really feeling ready to have another baby. I really felt like it was already time to have another. And according to the calendar, we were pregnant right before Halloween last year. We found out Nov. 6. Can you believe how little Calan was and I was already for another? But it was a strong emotion that I am NOT having this time at all. I know that we want more children, but I am actually really OK with waiting for a little bit this time. My day dream of having babies around me and enjoying their smiles and excitements and joys has really come true. And I love it.

I would wonder if I would get bored being a stay-at-home mom and the answer without a doubt is that I am never bored! Life gets a little bit on repeat, but I have been really lucky to find some great mom friends that I can call up and get together with. Play dates, lunches, coffee, story times, etc. are all wonderful moments for me. I love feeling a bond with some wonderful women and their wonderful children. This week has been great. Monday was obviously Halloween, yesterday we went to story time and then an impromptu play date in the afternoon, and today we just got back from a wonderful afternoon at the zoo with friends. Tomorrow, we have our play group class and not sure yet what we are going to do Friday, but I hope it is as fun as the rest of the week. Life isn't dull and I don't feel trapped by my children. Life is really kind of how I saw it. Great moments with great friends.

I have no regrets of leaving my job to be a mom and I have no desire to go back. I love being here and I love taking care of my family. I feel honored and blessed that my day dreams have come. And I do not miss the hours I spent pretending to work and pretending to enjoy what I was doing. The truth is my heart was never in it. My husband and my kids are my heart.

Yes, I know that not ever day is a dream and that there are days that I struggle (I have even blogged about it), but today is one of those glorious days that I can sit here and just day dream and smile and Thank God that my dreams are coming true.